As I sit writing this, our entire state is obsessed with what they perceive to be a great need. The need is simple. The Seattle Seahawks NEED to win the Super Bowl.
To understand why this is so important, you must realize that while Seattle has many fine qualities, having winning teams has not one been one of them. Because of this unfortunate flaw, a July 2013, Forbes article declared Seattle the Worst Sports City in America. Oh the shame!!! But now is our chance. We need revenge. We need hope. We need a win.
Needs are strange things. We all have them, but we don’t always express them. That was most certainly true for me. The strange thing was I didn’t even realize I had a problem in that area. Yes, I struggled to say no. Yes, I felt responsible for the world. But no, I didn’t have trouble expressing my own wants and desires. Or did I?
As I continued working on getting emotionally healthy a pattern began to form. I would read a book (or two or three), pray, study God’s word and try and sort out what had led me to my false values and depression. When I would get stuck or confused I’d call and arrange a session with my therapist or sometimes just a long talk with one of my sisters.
The whole “needs” situation came up when I went in for what I refer to as mental tune up. I had been doing well and was definitely getting stronger and less depressed. But there was something that kept popping up that I just couldn’t quite put my finger on. I would suddenly find myself angry or frustrated with no idea why. Where was that coming from?
When I went in to try and figure it out, I explained a situation that had caused that sudden feeling of anger. I wanted something and the other person involved had basically brushed aside what I had asked for. My therapist pointed out that the problem wasn’t the response. The problem was I hadn’t really expressed what I needed. Rather than saying, “I would like,” I had instead asked “Would you like…..?”. I wasn’t telling the person what I wanted, I was asking them what they wanted.
Unlike the other areas I had been trying to work through, this one was easy to check. For the next several weeks I tried to really listen to how I expressed what I wanted. Sure enough, the therapist had been right. Time after time I would ask rather than tell.
I realized I had been so worried about sinning by appearing pushy and overbearing, or not being submissive and loving enough, that I had become reluctant to express what I really wanted. Instead I asked, hoping that the person I was asking would see how much it meant to me and respond accordingly.
Another false value revealed. No, I shouldn’t go around telling everyone what to do. That would indeed be a sin. But learning how to express what I wanted and needed in a loving way was not only something I should do, it was something I had to do in order to be emotionally healthy. Another piece of the picture was coming together.
So, in an effort to make my needs clear, I want to state that I need the Seattle Seahawks to win the Super Bowl. If they don’t it will definitely have an effect on my mental health. GO HAWKS!!!!!